My family ate a lot of meals together growing up. On Friday nights, my mom would stop at Jewel after work. I loved unpacking the paper bags and spotting the yellow Lay’s potato chips and Dean’s French onion dip. One of her go-to meals? Toasted corned beef sandwiches on rye. No sauerkraut for me, thanks.
When Bill and I had kids of our own, we did the same thing: ate around the table. Partly because eating out with three kids wasn’t in the budget, but mostly because we believed what my parents believed—good things happen around kitchen tables.
A simple question like, “What’s the most memorable thing you learned today?” can lead to moments of connection, insight, and reflection.
Do you have a memory like that? A meal with your family that stuck with you—not just for the food, but for the feeling?
More importantly, meals like that are where children learn lessons that can shape their entire lives.
Take Sara Blakely. When she was growing up, her dad would ask her and her brother the same question every Friday night at dinner: “What did you fail at this week?” If they didn’t have an answer, he’d be disappointed.
Sara would never forget that question.
Years later, she was selling fax machines door to door. People slammed doors in her face. She saw her business card ripped up at least once a week. But instead of giving up, she got used to rejection. Even amused by it. She’d been doing it for seven years when inspiration struck.
She wanted to wear a pair of white pants to a party and needed a little shaping support—but also wanted to wear sandals. So she cut the feet off her pantyhose. And just like that, Spanx was born.
Initially, textile manufacturers said no—until one of them showed the prototype to his daughters, who said, “Dad, that’s genius!” Two years later, Oprah named it one of her Favorite Things. Twelve years later, Forbes named Sara Blakely the youngest self-made female billionaire in history. (I no doubt have been a major contributor!)
But behind that success was a mindset shaped at her family’s dinner table.
Her father wasn’t trying to make her fearless. He was trying to make her brave. He wanted her to try things, knowing that failure is part of growth. That when you pursue opportunities where you might fail, failure loses its power.
Today, in an era of constant entertainment and busy schedules, gathering around the table is becoming more rare. But some things are still worth prioritizing—whether it’s at home, in classrooms, or around workplace conference tables.
Ever since I read about Sara Blakely’s story, I think about her father’s question, What did you fail at this week?
It’s helped me reframe how I look at my own risks, missteps, and moments of uncertainty. It’s not just that failure is good—that message can feel hollow in the moment. It’s that by expecting failure as part of the process, we give ourselves permission to try.
And sometimes, the trying is what transforms us.
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